12/28/2007

What are your resolutions for the new year?

We all want to lose weight, eat healthy, save more money, spend less, spend more time with those we love, be a better person, etc. And there is nothing wrong with any of those things at all. It's said that it only takes 3 days to get into the habit of doing something.
I think at this point, I've seen in my life that this is simply not true for most things.
It must be a decision you make to "finally" make changes in your life for whatever reason and then find someone to help hold you accountable.
I think that accountability thing is my problem. I keep finding people that say they will hold me accountable and then they renig. Or they ask me to hold them accountable and then get upset with me when I do.
Well, on any note, I'm resolving to get closer to God, find out who I am in Christ, find out who God is, and truely become a disciple of Christ. I'm also resolving to teach my children how to study the Word for themselves and how to hear from God. We, my children and I, will hold each other accountable by having evening discussions about what we read earlier in the day. We will be using the Bible Study/Prayer Journal format listed earlier.
What does this have to do with standing for your marriage? Well, when you truely know God for yourself and He becomes your everything, including your husband, you are a brighter light for your husband and others too. You can lead others to Christ by your example sometimes more than with your words. That is my hope and desire. But you will begin to see your husband as God sees him. I once prayed this about my husband and immediately God gave me a vision of a little boy, balled up in a corner, crying. He saw my husband as a litttle boy in need of love and acceptance. I never shared that with my husband, but some days later his words to me were "I just want to be accepted for who I am, love me for me". AMAZING!!!
What life lasting changes will you make for God?

12/27/2007

Trust & Obey

Trust and Obey...For there is no other way. These are very popular words to a great hymn. Words that ring true in the heart of every believer. There is no other way, but to trust and obey our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Times will get hard and the road will get rough, but in all honesty, there is no one on earth you can trust or obey.

Confession: I have in the past few weeks, stopped trusting and obeying. I'm not proud to confess that, but I must be honest with you that are keeping up with my blog and all that is going on with my stand for my marriage.

I didn't say it with my mouth, as I've done in the past. But I did however, just stop obeying God to stand for my marriage, in that I stopped praying for it. I stopped praying for my husband to come home and just said whatever happens...happens.

Well, how many of you know that that is not what God desires of us? If it were to be that way then in the beginning God would have said well, whatever happens, happens. Jesus would have said of us (without going to the cross) whatever happens, happens. But God's words were specific in the beginning and Jesus was very specific in his purpose for coming to earth. How could we His children be any less specific?
I first laid blame that I needed someone to hold me accountable in my prayers and walk. God said to me, My Word is what holds you accountable. OUCH!!!!
He said to me, either you believe that I am God, that I am able, and that I can do ANYTHING. I said yes, you are God, you are able, and You can do All things. He said you speak truth with your mouth and lies with your heart. Your words are like clanging symbols to me. I said but Lord, nothing is happening.
Ouch, Ouch, Ouch...because then it was as though He said to me...How can you know what I do in the spirit and in my time? Nothing is happening in your time, true, but my time is not your time, neither is my way your way. Hold on and see what I have to bestow upon you.
AHHHHHHHH the love of my Lord pouring down over me. How could I doubt? Because I am human in a self, instant gratification world. I want what I want and I want it right now.
Well, all that to say I know your struggle, I am there just as you are. I know it gets hard especially when it seems like nothing is happening. Know that the moment you prayed the God of heaven began to work. The reason it begins to get so hard for us is that we take our eyes off of God and put them on our feelings, our situations, and so forth. When we take our cares upon ourselves, it becomes unbearable to bear. Lets cast our cares and concerns back on the One who said we could lay them at His feet and let Him also carry us through.
May God Bless You as you stand for the one you love and never let go of God. He gave you the desire to stand for your marriage because He is standing for your marriage.

12/21/2007

What's Been Happening?

Well, I started back to work on 12-17 in the OB/GYN Department. I was/am very grateful and blessed, but it did send me into a bit of depression. I was getting back into the swing of things being at home and had begun to see behavior and attitudes in my children changing. They need me at home with them so badly.

I've been at work a full week now and thankfully the Christmas holidays are coming up. I will have 5 more days at home with my children. I did get alot of organizing and decluttering done last week while I was home and I'm hoping to do more of the same in the next 5 days. Well, after I finish knitting Christmas gifts that is. I'm going to be busy, busy, busy!!! ;-)

The children are cherishing their break. The girls are knitting away and planning their last minute shopping outings this weekend.

I regret in a sense there will be no store bought gifts under the tree from me to them, but in another sense, I am blessed to be able to give them something from my heart. Thankfully we taught them what Christmas is really about and that Jesus is the reason for the season and we must celebrate Him, not ourselves.

We will attend church on Sunday and prayerfully their dad will join us, we'll pray for it anyway.

12/11/2007

Cherish every moment

This afternoon my son and I went to pay the electric bill. At first I was going to make him stay home and finish his school work, but at the last minute changed my mind.

As we were riding along, he began to ask me questions about his father, talk about various topics that were on his heart, and at times just be down right silly. I looked over at him, thinking to myself, that in just a few short years these opportunities will be gone.

There were moments that I got to share spiritual things with him and I realized that now is the time for me not only to make memories, but now is the time for me to speak truth into his life/heart. Now is the time that God has given me to speak into his life what God wants him to hear that will carry him on into his adult life. I cherish this time that God has given me to mold his life and speak truth to him. I am so very grateful that God would entrust to me the vessels in each of my 3 children that I could fill them with His truth.

Don't take any moment for granted. God gives us these moments to raise soldiers for His kingdom. Take every opportunity and sow seeds of righteousness into your children.

Simple Instructions

I was reading my Bible this morning and as usual I read the passages in 2 different translations. I do this often just to see how the other might speak something to me that I may have missed the first time. Well, I was reading Psalms 91 and became overwhelmed with an urge and desire to just praise and worship my Lord and Savior. But as I read verses 14-16, I sensed God saying that this was His promise to all who believe in Him.
Psalms 91:14-16 (The Message Translation): “If you’ll hold onto me for dear life,” says God, “I’ll get you out of any trouble. I’ll give you the best of care if you’ll only get to know and trust me. Call me and I’ll answer, be at your side in bad times; I’ll rescue you, then throw you a party. I’ll give you a long life, give you a long drink of salvation!”
We hold on to so much for dear life, our children, marriages, jobs, and God says if we’ll just hold on to Him, there is NOTHING He won’t do for us. I am guilty, I held onto my marriage and self-preservation. I held these things above God and He allowed them to crumble around me. Not to bring me pain and suffering, but to bring me in right standing with Him. It wasn’t enough to just say I was a Christian and had accepted Christ as my Savior. He wanted me to hold on to Him for dear life.
He wants to give us the best of care and what we’ve settled for when we try to do things our way, is less than God’s best. Won’t you take Him at His Word and release all things to Him and hold on to Him for dear life? It’s well worth it and you won’t be sorry.

12/10/2007

Counting My Blessings

Most wouldn't count it a blessing, but I sure am. I am a temp with UT Southwestern Medical Center. My assignment ended abruptly last Tuesday. As of today, I still don't have an assignment, which means no money coming in right now. However, I am not worried. I am enjoying my time here at home with my children which is where I truely want to be anyway.

My oldest DD went to stay with a friend for the weekend, leaving me home with my other DD and DS. We watched movies, ate pizza, went to the parade Sat. morning, put up the Christmas tree and put the lights on the cross that the children built and put in the middle of the yard.

Today, I enjoyed making a warm breakfast for my children. My youngest DD made green smoothies for us and I prepared instant oatmeal packets for the children. I have had the most fun today, than I have had in a long time.

I miss being home with my children full time. I am missing out on so much of their lives. Many think that since they are 12, 14, and 15 then all the momentus moments are finished, but I must say they are not.

In being home with them I am seeing the deterioration of my children's relationships with one another and with me. My heart grows heavy thinking of it. I have talked until I am blue in the face about preserving these relationships but talk is doing no good. I daily pray for things to turn around.

Never-the-less, I still must say this has been a most blessed day for me and them.

Green Smoothies Anyone?

My youngest DD made Green Smoothies this morning.

It is a joy to me to see her jump in and create a new "concoction" every time. No smoothie has been the same since we began making them earlier this year. In fact, today's smoothie contained carrots for the first time and celery. Yummy!!!

We've tried them with berries, but I don't think any of us really care for the seeds we have to deal with when we drink the smoothie. We really like bananas and peaches in our smoothies, but what is the most fun is trying out different veggies to see what flavor we get.

We did create a smoothie we will NEVER try again. We got the brilliant idea of putting in a grapefruit. YUK!!!!!!! And I would have to agree with my children on that one. Talk about bitter. It was down right nasty. Needless to say, no amount of honey or fruit added to it could tone the bitterness down. So take our word on it, unless you like bitter, grapefruit is not for smoothies.

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