Trusting God

It's been a long time since I've fasted.  A long time since I've felt led by the Lord.  I didn't wake up with that in mind yesterday, but as I prayed for a friend yesterday, I felt the Lord tugging my heart to invite her to join me in a fast.

Hmmmmm, I didn't at first.  I totally did my best to ignore the nudging and almost ended the conversation.  However, God just doesn't let things go that easily.

So I invited her to join me in a fast.

We are still working out the logistics, the day(s) we will fast and because she gets sick easily, she will only fast a meal, but the Lord is clearly leading me to fast according to His timing.  So many things the Lord has begun to lay on my heart to pray for during our time of fasting and praying.  I need to begin a list of those things before I can no longer remember.

Over the last few days, the Lord has also begun to rekindle my heart to stand for my marriage.  Yes, by all accounts, I can divorce Biblically.  Yet, the Lord has constantly turned my heart away from divorce each time I have tried to make that step.  There are times I don't want to desire this man.  This man that has hurt me so deeply.  And yet, as I reminisce about our early years, I remember a man I fell in love with.  No, I didn't pray before we married.  I was far from saved.  I had no idea to pray for my future mate.  But the day we said I do, the Lord was present and in the midst of that day and our lives.  So, if I'm honest with myself and my God, I want my marriage to be restored.  I want our lives to be transformed for the glory of the Lord.  A testimony of God's strength and power and I want to encourage others to stand for their marriages as well.

In the meantime, if you feel led, pray for God's wisdom and direction in my life and the lives of my family.  I leave you with this neat story from Moody Radio.  A Marriage Carol   It has blessed me, I pray it blesses you as well.

Give Me a Clean Heart

I started reading someone's blog after I typed in Googles search engine Bible study for heart transformation.  I came across Tracy's blog.  The great thing is I've been able to really sit and ponder what my hearts desires really are.  She stated it may take some time, but I knew immediately what my hearts desires are and wrote them down.

To minister to women that are standing for their marriages and families when they are crumbling all around them.  To see my WHOLE family walking with the Lord and being about our Father's business.  That the marriages in my WHOLE family will be restored to fullness and great richness in Christ.
It is NOT enough for me to just have my heart transformed and changed and walking with the Lord.  It's not enough for me to just be filled with the Holy Spirit!  I want my ENTIRE FAMILY transformed, changed, filled, and walking with the Lord!!!!  I want to see my nephews and nieces, my nephews wife, my sisters, my brother in love, my husband, my children, me...all chasing after Him and walking out His will for our lives!!!!!!

I want Ezekiel 36:25-27 for myself and my WHOLE family
Then I will sprinkle clean water on you and you will be clean.  Your filth will be washed away and you will no longer worship idols.   And I will give you a new heart with new and right desires and I will put a new spirit in you.  I will take out your stony heart of sin and give you a new obedient heart.  And I will put My Spirit in you so you will obey my laws and do whatever I command. (NLT)

I don't want us to have to think twice about our will verses God's will.  I want us to be so hungry and thirsty for God and His will and our love for Him so rich and genuine that we can't wait to wake up each morning to fulfill another paragraph in the chapters of our lives and the book of His will.

Blog Decisions

I'm not happy with the direction my blog has been going lately.  I want to keep it real, but I also want God to shine forth from my posts more and more.  In other words, I want to show more of Him and less of me.  I want my posts to be more encouraging and uplifting.  I want people to want to read my blog and walk away feeling that they were enlightened, not depressed or thinking woe is Tasha.  I will continue to post about the happenings around here and I will continue to keep it real, but there will be more posts that point you to Jesus.

This also means that God will have to do a work in my heart.  Turning my heart from hopelessness to hopeful, depression into joy, gloom into vitality and life.

Please pray as I begin to learn how to let God use my mind, heart, and hands to convey His heart to those that follow my blog and that lives will be changed and transformed because of it.