12/23/2008

Tough Love

Would some of you leave me a comment and tell me your feelings about Tough Love?
I've been doing some reading and I'm just a little curious. Afterwards, I'll post
again and share what I read, then you can comment on that too. LOL




ADDENDUM: Ok, I was reading this book that said tough love was not Biblical. It referred to the passage that says Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. Now I've never called it tough love, but I have said there are consequences for all actions; some good and some not so good. The consequences don't change my level of love, but I think it expresses my love. If I did not love, I would not allow for any consequences for any behavior.

Thank you all for your input!!! I appreciate your perspectives.

3 comments:

Nola said...

Not sure what your idea or reading about "Tough Love" is. I know that we are stricked and if it is said we back it up. If you have read my blog long you know this came as a shock to our new 16 yo. She is getting it and blossoming.

Our therapist loves our approach to healing and loving these hurt kids. They are healing. She and I both know that it is Holy Spirit healing, but it is also because we do honor Him and try hard to follow what He wants with our kids.

All this rambling to say get with God and seek Him in what He wants you to do with your kids.

Nola

GammySel said...

Tasha-
Tough Love- is biblical- The Lord showed it to the Isrealites- as the wondered for 40 years in the wilderness.. The proverbs speak of it- or you create a foolish man or woman. So as for tough love- I think it is necessary in molding the character of your child for the Lord.

Love to you
Angie

Nola said...

Maybe "tough" love has a bad name. I think allowing consequences, accountability and responsibility is what we are all talking about. We just use different words.

Today one of mine had to get up at 5 AM. Why? She didn't do her responsibilities last night. She also chose not to finish the dishes from last night in a timely manor. That earned her dishes for the week. She knew ahead of time what was going to happen. It was her choice. She laughed as she looked at her choices after the fact. "Maybe I will make better choices next time. This was kinda stupid." She is 8. The 12 yo had to leave a note for dad to wake him at 5 in the morning. He didn't manage to get up and down stairs by 8. I made him write his own note. :) Is this tough love? Or is this teaching them to be responsible adults?

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